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Unjust Humanity
Separated fathers cry foul, threaten to sit on hunger strike if demands not met 24 February, 2015
When a marriage is on rocks and there are kids involved, contrary to popular belief, it's not the kids but the fathers who are the worst victims. The kids are at least allowed to live with one parent - the mother, but the father is totally alienated from his kid.

The conservative nature of the Indian society has always endorsed mother to be a better parent - someone who can make best decisions in the interest of the child. However, with the feminists demanding fathers to play larger roles in raising children like changing diapers, getting them ready to school etc. and modern day Fathers supporting their cause, they have become indispensable for a child.

While the Fathers have gleefully accepted this change for good, the entire contrivance goes for a toss whenever there is a divorce or separation and women start exploiting conservatism to their gain to obtain complete authority over the child by playing the victim card. They are further supported by the judiciary which is still running as per 16th century traditional school of thoughts and considers Father to be just a 'Financial Provider' for the child. It is a perfect example of how women are manipulating the system for their own selfish good and how men continue to be at the receiving end

Depriving Father's love to a child is also a matter of child abuse. The feeling of incompleteness of family develops inherent insecurity in children as a result of which they develop complex personality imbalances. It is up to the civil society, the media and the government to decide whether they want to allow a fatherless society to develop in India or take some steps to prevent its formation.

One of the positive steps towards this is to understand and emphasize the need for joint custody/shared parenting so that the catastrophic effects of parental divorce/separation are minimized if not trivialized and not only the Father but the paternal grandparents of the children can also enjoy the company of their grandchildren.

Save Indian Family Foundation - Fathers' Rights Wing (SIFF-FRW) is part of Save Indian Family Foundation. SIFF-FRW recognizes the serious effects of "parental alienation" on children due to single parent families on account of divorce or separation.

1.    SIFF-FRW works to create awareness in the society about father's rights.

2.    Thousands of aggrieved fathers approach SIFF-FRW every year which reflects the despicable state of Indian fathers.

3.    Rights of Indian fathers are trampled under cute names like "best interest of child" which actually translate to "best interest of mother".

4.    Even while there could be some cases where the courts have granted visitation to fathers, yet mothers refuse to respect the orders and do not allow the father to meet the child. Such errant, cruel and insensitive mothers go unpunished in an anti-father gynocentric family court system.

5.    Apart from the family court system, fathers are also subjected to systematic bias within the society as well. Most often abusive women play upon the fatherly feelings of a man and alienate him from his children. Many men are threatened with false dowry and false domestic violence cases if they try to get close to the children.

6.    Nowadays, many disgruntled women are also framing fathers in false rape, molestation and sexual abuse cases of their own children. These attacks on fathers are dastardly acts and many men break down due to such abuse resulting in suicides and sometimes murders (of women) followed by suicides.

7.    Fathers are routinely treated as SPERM DONORS and ATM MACHINES and any other attempt by the father to get involved in the life of his kids results in emotional and sometimes physical abuse of the father. Many fathers are also threatened with kidnapping cases if they try to meet their children. In fact, there are many such fathers who have approached SIFF-FRW for help and guidance when they have been framed in the kidnapping cases for their own kids.

8.    There are instances wherein fathers are told to write-off property in wife or child's name as a precondition to spend quality time with their children.

9.    In most of the cases, the grandparents of the child from the paternal side are deprived of the bonding with their grandchildren and they cannot spend time with their own grandchildren for the fear of further abuse of their son.

10.  Such gross injustice against fathers is a clear reflection of the lack of father's rights in the society. Hence, SIFF-FRW seeks to create awareness in the society about father's rights and educate the society about the paramount importance of fathers and a sustainable parent-child relationship with fathers.

SIFF-FRW has approached His Excellency, The Honorable Governor of Karnataka in order to raise the issue of high-handedness and insensitivity of the judges of family court when it comes to matters of child custody and visitation to fathers.

If the demands, as laid down below aren't met by March 2nd 2015, SIFF-FRW will call for a 'Hunger Strike' at Freedom Park in Bangalore on 7th & 8th Mar' 2015.

The demands by SIFF-FRW on behalf of aggrieved fathers are:-

1.    Fathers should be given Child Visitation orders in all matrimonial cases within 15 days of the petition.

2.    Courts must immediately deny maintenance/alimony to any woman who opposes or indirectly attempts to prevent her separated husband from accessing and parenting the children and also to working/highly educated mothers.

3.    Courts must initiate contempt proceedings suo-motu against those mothers who do not respect visitation orders.

4.    Children must not be allowed to be used as pawns in custody disputes.

5.    Children must not be allowed to be used as money earning tools by women in custody disputes.

6.    Under no circumstances the grandparents of the child must be denied access to the children.

7.    Govt. must allocate funds for conducting research on the adverse impacts on fatherless children.

8.    Single mothers should be given mandatory counselling to increase involvement of biological Father in children's lives

9.    Reforms in the existing child visitation/custody laws - 'Shared parenting' must be the default arrangement if case of separation or divorce between spouses.

Fathers' use of technology like Skype and video conferencing to get in touch with children should not be curtailed by judiciary.

Editorial NOTE: This article is categorized under Opinion Section. The views expressed in this article are solely those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of In case you have a opposing view, please click here to share the same in the comments section.
About The Author
Virag R Dhulia, a software professional, has been a prominent men's rights activist. He has been engaged in creating awareness about the abuse of men and their families through anti-male and gender biased laws like Section 498A, Domestic Violence Act etc. He has been instrumental in networking with fellow men's rights activist both across India and abroad and has played key roles in organizing events to create awareness about abuse of men by the society. A book titled, 'The Secrets of Manhood' authored by Virag has been published. This book is a collection of short articles which focus on issues and problems faced by men and how men are victims of social stereotypes.
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