The comedy of errors of the Army Chief's duality of age

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Duke Sekhon

25 May, 2011

It is rather ridiculous to see that the Army Headquarters and the Defence Ministry have failed to resolve the issue of a General's correct age, right from the time of his joining the service until his impending retirement from service.

IT IS rather ridiculous to see that the Army Headquarters and the Defence Ministry has failed to resolve the simple issue of a general's correct age, right from the time of his joining the service until his impending retirement from service as the Chief of the Army staff within an year’s time.

What sort of war strategies can we expect the Army Chief and his supporting staff to device, when most of his time is preoccupied by the unravelling of the intriguing mystery of the duality of his own age. The controversy was primarily given birth by his own confusion? Apart from his own déjà vu, he has unwittingly succeeded in foxing the entire lot at the Army Headquarters and the Defence ministry to boot, in the process embarrassing the central government enough as to make it coyly turn its face the other way, as if nothing was the matter.

As a diversionary tactics, the aspiring General was quick enough to declare in the media, following Osama incident, that the Army under his explicit command was quite the capable and willing enough to conduct stealth military attacks across the borders successfully, to neutralise enemy’s covert terror camps; thereby, unnecessarily raising hackles in the enemy quarters, inviting furious challenges and counter threats of retribution to the chagrin and embarrassment of the India government, who would have rather dealt with the delicate matter at diplomatic level.

The General’s open articulation regarding Army’s capabilities of undertaking covert attacks across the borders makes one speculate whether his needlessly expressed intent of aggression against the enemy was actually a calculated attempt at influencing the government’s decision in allowing him a second term as the Army Chief, by resolving the issue of age in his favour.

The media is having a field day at the undue consternation caused by the General’s uncalled for remarks to the discomfiture of the Armed Forces, the Ministry of defence, and the central Government itself, as reports indicate the continuation of the indecisiveness on the part of all concerned at the official level. The media has mockingly pointed out that the entities concerned have tied themselves in knots over the issue and are still in a bind regarding what should be the proper response.

While bloomers are the order of the day in this country - the Home Minister suddenly decided to enliven the political scene by serving the beloved nation a hand of bloomers after foolishly shuffling a pack of cads full of jokers and jackasses. The wits defying question regarding the inclusion or exclusion of the identity of a particular bloody terrorist or an accomplished criminal on the roll of honour of “Deadly Desperados”, still remains unresolved; and, thanks to our media, the silly lapses have become a matter of speculation at home and the butt of unkind jokes abroad.

I think the visual media is going to suffer gastric convulsions as usual (in spite of its unwholesome appetite and enormous capacity for ingesting the acerbic dregs from the gutter), and throw up what all it has swallowed in the raw with a devastating and nauseating effect, to earn everyone’s ill will.