MANY PEOPLE HAVE talked about emotional abuse perpetrated by men towards the women. While it exists and should be condemned, it should be remembered that there are times when a woman abuses a man emotionally or physically or both. The television that exists in the USA and western societies has dictated that “if a woman cannot have sex, throw the bum out.” Even United States’ Latin stations like Univision, Telefutura, and Telemundo have joined in such abuse with programmes like ‘Laura’, or one hosted by a Dr Nancy Alvarez (who is a Psychologist).
These TV programmes put emotional strain on couples and if a man is not up to sexual standards, he is given the divorce papers, falsely accused of emotional and physical violence, placed under strain physically and mentally to the point of being mentally hacked to death or sent to a psychiatric institution.
If there is a problem during the first night of the wedding, it is the man that suffers if he is unable to perform. A woman, at times, prefers a man who performs sexually but does not perform ‘other husbandly duties’ of work, paying taxes, and being a good citizen to a man who complies with everything but the ‘sexual component’ either because of poor health (“He is hiding behind his disease”) or the fact that the husband may be afraid of failure if his wife becomes angry with him for not maintaining an erection.
This emotional abuse is hidden in many families and has to be exposed for those men who, at times, have suffered.
It does not help that feminism, which is a western imperialist concept, which denies the family in favour of the individuality of the woman to do whatever she wants. At least feminism has an antidote.
This antidote is called womanism and is in Iran. Stephania Harris has also espoused womanism in her blog. Womanism is the right of the woman to be herself but also to respect the family and the husband. It does not necessarily mean servitude for the woman. It means empowerment for the woman, her family, while ensuring domestic tranquility in the family. It is also based in spiritual concepts found in all of the world’s major religions, such as Christianity, Judaism, Hinduism, and Buddhism.
While this does not excuse the fact that men have to attempt to perform their duties as a husband including the sexual component, it should be remembered that married couples do not need the strains or pressures of “do this” when things can be achieved through peaceful means.
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