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Unjust Humanity
Virag
Uniform Civil Code: Dividing men uniformly 17 October, 2016
Bunty and Babli were playing and a fight ensued between them leading to "no more talks" and both the kids were in their own world. And it took some days for the rivalry to vanish and for friendship to be re-established. But during that period there was total non-cooperation between the two, even for genuine reasons.
Currently, that is the situation of Hindu Men and Muslim Men with respect to the Uniform Civil Code debate. So, what's this debate all about? In a very layman's language, it means "One nation, one law". Currently, there are many religious laws in India for marriage and ancestral property inheritance which brings a lot of disparity within the same country based on religion and ethnicity.

Uniform Civil Code seeks to eradicate the disparities. For example, Muslims have an option of "Triple Talaq" wherein, if the husband utters the word "Talaq" in front of a Maulvi three times in a row in three consecutive months, he can get divorce from his wife, pay the Mehr to her which was decided in the Nikaah and maintain her for the Iddat Period which is typically 3 months.

However, a Hindu man has to either hope that his wife agrees for mutual consent divorce (that too on amicable terms) or fight a long battle of 20-30 years in family courts trying to get divorce and during all these years, keep on paying maintenance to the wife.

On the face of it, it appears that Muslim men have a great advantage which Hindu men do not have and with the Uniform Civil Code coming in, the Triple Talaq option will go away thus bringing all men on the same platform. But as I said earlier, Bunty and Babli are not cooperating with each other. Similarly, Hindu and Muslim men seem to be at loggerheads with each other or within themselves on this issue.

But men, oh men, why do you behave so naively? Is divorce the only issue to be considered while breaking off from marriage?

Do you think, merely because a Muslim man gets divorce easily, he cannot be implicated in 498A (Dowry case), Domestic Violence case and maintenance cases?

It's not divorce that's the main issue. It's the financial exploitation of a man in the name of marriage that's a far more serious issue and that affects both Hindu and Muslim men equally, or for that matter, any man. And it is this issue, over which men are maintaining a miraculous radio silence. Men are being misled by the mainstream media into believing that paying money to their wife is their duty and all they need to do, is worry about divorce.

This penchant of men for running behind divorce has made it a ballgame for women. So, while, it's the women also who are equally finding marriage as a blot on personal freedom and want to come out of it, but since men are so madly running behind divorce, women are free to play the victim card and make hay while the sun shines. A typical divorce settlement that is happening these days is around Rs 15-20 lakhs. All, that the woman needs to do is cry foul, shed some crocodile tears, feign an injury or two at times and she can happily smile her way to the bank while still being called the victim.

Whereas, men, on the other hand, are fighting with each other, being ill-influenced by the feminist dogma that women are victims in marriage and it being a patriarchal society, so we need reforms which snatch away the human and constitutional rights of men further and such pseudo-liberal men think, they are being progressive. No, my dear friends, you are being regressive. You are still saying that women cannot be independent and a man needs to maintain a woman merely because he married her.

Even, after marriage, if the woman is not able to maintain her, still then the burden of maintaining her cannot be put on the husband. If our religion and culture says, so, change that first. Because, it's the fault of the parents of the woman for not educating her and not making her self-dependent and self-sufficient, rather, bringing her up as a victim and making her dependent on another man.

And if you think, divorce hurts women, then you are disconnected from reality. The real problem is, that as a society, we are married to the concept of marriage to the extent of trampling individual happiness and contentment. And such is the height of hypocrisy in our society that on one hand, we say marriage is for individual happiness (that's how the concept is marketed to youngsters) and on the other hand, when anyone (man or woman) is unhappy in the marriage, we tell them to think beyond person and sacrifice individual happiness for the sake of maintaining the continuum of marriage. If at all, a reform is needed, it's needed here first. We need to respect individual happiness in a marriage and make divorce easy.

Currently, divorce has become an industry for the family courts and lawyers who make it extremely difficult to take divorce under the cute argument of saving the marriage and then make money. It needs to be remembered that a marriage which has reached courts, ought to be broken as soon as possible in the interest of individual happiness.

Uniform Civil Code, whether it comes or not, will not be changing the situation for men much. Men will continue to be riled on the pretext of the social mindset that he must continue to maintain the woman. But the question is, why? Why should the man maintain the woman when the relationship is over? Why are men not questioning this? Why are men silent on this? And why are men worried about women?

Men, you need not worry about women. It's up to the women to make sure initiatives like #BetiBachaoBetiPadhao are implemented properly and then women get jobs using which they can maintain themselves. Men, need to worry about their own selves. It's the men who are being sent to jail because they are husbands, it's the men who are being alienated from their children because they are fathers, and it's the men who are being made to pay through their nose in matrimonial litigations because they are men. These realities are retrograde in nature and which seek a reform.

It's time, Hindu and Muslim men stop behaving like Bunty and Babli and they realize the sinister plot that keeps them divided, fighting and oppressed and raise a voice against the same. Uniform Civil Code is dividing men uniformly, it's uniting their enemies. Wake up men! Wake up!

And for the Modi Government, before bringing in Uniform Civil Code, we need serious upheaval of maintenance provisions and the way courts are functioning currently.

1. It should be made mandatory for all courts to verify income of both parties.

2. The onus of the proof of the income of wife should not be on the husband.

3. Any judge, who orders maintenance to an educated and/or working woman should not be promoted and such an act can also become ground for dismissal of the judge.

First and foremost, we need to bring in judicial reforms and then only any new law should be brought in. Till then, Bunty and Babli should maintain harmony.

Editorial NOTE: This article is categorized under Opinion Section. The views expressed in this article are solely those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of merinews.com. In case you have a opposing view, please click here to share the same in the comments section.
About The Author
Virag R Dhulia, a software professional, has been a prominent men's rights activist. He has been engaged in creating awareness about the abuse of men and their families through anti-male and gender biased laws like Section 498A, Domestic Violence Act etc. He has been instrumental in networking with fellow men's rights activist both across India and abroad and has played key roles in organizing events to create awareness about abuse of men by the society. A book titled, 'The Secrets of Manhood' authored by Virag has been published. This book is a collection of short articles which focus on issues and problems faced by men and how men are victims of social stereotypes.
COMMENTS (4)
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Jaswant Rawat
Being a mediator, I was handling a case yesterday wherein the dispute was between the brother and the sister with regards to the property of their late mother. The sister filed a suit for seeking partition and damages against the brother asking that she is entitled for 1/2 share in the property as well as the damages for using her share by the brother. As per law both are entitled for equal share in the property of their parents as now daughter/wife have got right under the Hindu Women Property Right in ancestral property of the parents and hence the wife has right in her matrimonial against her husband or in-laws as well in her parental home in regards of the ancestral property of the parents. In this case, brother was in army and used to send money to his parents and when he was discharged from the service he got retirement benefits and out of which he constructed the rooms on the land owned by their mother. Not only he sent money in the marriage of his only sister and performed all religious duties when his parent expired. After the marriage of his sister, there was some matrimonial dispute and the brother supported his sister and finally was able to rejoined her in her matrimonial home. Now the brother is ready to give half shares in the property of mother to his sister but asking Rs. 5 Lakhs money which he spent in construction of the rooms 10 years back which he has no evidence. The sister refused to give money but asking her share. IS IT EQUABILITY FOR WHICH WE ARE SEEKING UNIFORM CIVIL CODE. The government is not sensitive to the plight of half section of our society i.w. male/husband. It has been recognized by court that there is maximum misuse of 406/498-A IPC and inspite of that there is no change in the law.
Amit Shrivastava
nicely written
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