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Aero DNA
Dhiraj Ahuja | 10 Sep 2006

This piece is all about creative directors of advertising agencies spinning illusons to lure the target audience into buying brands they work for. They come up with acronyms and terminologies straight

Travelling by the Delhi Metro is an experience in itself...there's a general euphoria that we finally have something that's world class. The twinkle in the eyes of the fellow traveller tells you all. However, the world is made of all kinds of people is proved yet again when someone takes a scissor out of his pocket and test scratches the stainless steel seats to check the authenticity of the claim--scratchless. How I wish the Delhi Metro had steel on the windows as well for the tough glass tells you other side of the story as the train moves out of the station. The same sad story we have been living with and stepped out of just before stepping into the Metro. Anyway, what's this got to do with Aero DNA? Well, nothing except the fact that I strayed from the topic again. Not completely either for this is where I saw the second bad ad. The digitized display inside the coach has two ads next to it...the same display that tells you about the forthcoming stations and about minding the gap from the door time and again along with male and female monotone from old Doordarshan news anchors...one that you could not take your eyes off and marvelled about technological wonder when you boarded the Metro for the very first time...

One amidst those two ads was of LG IntelloAir range of air conditioners. IntelloAir sounds as if the air conditioner turns the air intelligent all of a sudden...the moment you switch the machine on, the air develops brains to blow over hot spots. It is very much acceptable for the creative director may have wished for a different positioning...one in which the AC senses the temperature of the ambient air and turns on and off automatically. However, that's there even in the assembled machines and it is the intelligence of the machine and not the air. We can skip this conveniently. But what leaves one totally transfixed is the Aero DNA that IntelloAir range of ACs from LG are fitted with. That too with a twisted DNA ladder shown as supporting visual. As per the ad-wallahs we either have our science books all messed up in our brains or are naive enough to think of Aero DNA as a strand of the new strain that invades ambient air the moment one installs IntelloAir at homes and offices. For God's sake, can someone on Earth tell me what's DNA gotta do with ambient air quality, purity, temperature etc?

The moment I stepped out of the Metro station I had the Aero DNA all over my mind. Despite the fact that I had taken the hanky out of my pocket and placed it over my nose as an involuntary and subconscious action for the familiar stench of the open nallah had beaten the 'Aero DNA' content of the ambient air hands down. God wasn't intelligent enough to buy and install IntelloAir for the world. It's unfair of Him...How could He, of all the forces, deprive us and the universe of something as quintessential as 'Aero DNA.'

By the way, LG claims on its website that Aero DNA kills viruses and sterlises the air...not to forget the elimination of organic compounds. And lastly, I am not against air conditioners...I have three machines from different brands installed at my office and home...but believe me...I have already started missing Aero DNA for they do not come with something as fancy and innovative as this. It's time for industrial cooling systems to claim Aero RNA...now whatever that may mean...it is for the creative director to develop...what on Earth does he get a fat packet every month for?