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The Age of the Army
Ananya.s.guha | 02 Apr 2012

This is a spoof on the present controversy in the Army bringing in its wake questions related to financial corruption, deals with corporations and supply of low quality material for purchase of vehicles meant for the Army.

“What is General V. K. Singh up to?” my friend’s loud voice assailed my drooping ears.

“Why?” I asked innocuously. “You fool” he stomped “can’t you see? He is holding the country to ransom.”

“How, why?” I asked piquantly.

“Firstly, his diatribes against the Govt. regarding his age”.

“Then?” I asked.

“Now he is trying to implicate the Govt. in a bribe which he claims he was offered.”

“Maybe” I said. “Perhaps he was offered”.

“But that is scurrilous” my friend objected.

“Look, look “I tried to pacify him “maybe that man knows that the Lt. General was acting at the behest of the Govt.”.

“How can that be and why now?” my friend countered.

“Yes, yes” I sighed. “Maybe after being embattled in the age imbroglio he is trying to get back”.

“But is this the way? And why, all that noise about the internal threat to the Army’s security and that hogwash?”

“My dear friend” I said assuringly “maybe there are corrupt elements, and if the Army is threatened the Nation is threatened.” And why may I ask are all those politicians gaing up against him, and that crusader for honesty Anna?”.

“I don’t know that. All that I know is that, as someone said in India the Govt. determines the age of the Army and in Pakistan the Army determines the age of the Govt…”

“It is the Age of the Army” I said soberly.

“Yes, yes it truly is…” he concurred.

“But we must be cautious if the Army takes over then we might have military rule…” I counterpoised. “And moreover all these politicians look abjectly threatened. Now they seem to be speaking in one voice, the Left, the Middle, the Right, the Centre, the Right to Centre, the middle of the Centre etal.” This I said in one breath and with a glint in my eye.

“Moreover…” I continued: “And one of Team Anna’s member’s comments about our MPs being criminals has put them into the defensive and cornered them…”

“Yes, yes” my friend said; “I am preparing a list of all such people” my friend remarked.

“And, then what will you do with it?” I queried.

“Why, I will send it to Parliament…” was his quiet reply.

“Oh” I stuttered.

“So it is a full circle!” I mumbled.

“And what about the Army Scandal?” I asked.

“Oh come off it, they should all contest for MPs and then fight from inside…”

I could not take all that in.

So I left humming the tune: “So we say we have an Army in the Air”, which I learnt in school.